Cousin marriage is common in all Muslim countries. It is in accordance with the teaching of the Holy Quran and our Prophet had married his daughter with his broher son. There were no defects in the children. Cousin marriage is thought to generate more stable relationship. Children are born with defects whether it is cousin marriage or not. Among migrant Muslim commnuities the defects are due to many factors. The pressure of moving to a differnt cultural environment and moving from their families, problems of racism and employment are responsible for the defects during pregnancies.The defects are nothing to do with cousin marriages. The hidden agenda is that European societies do not want Muslims to bring their spouses from Muslim countries. A man/woman has the right to marry anybody from anywhere. It is a question of human right and and the right given to Muslims by the Holy Quran and the sayings of the Holy Prophet.
salaamz brother, just have to say very well said, (although I am in two minds about this topic), I believe the discipline plays a large part, having a rishta within families brings families closer together, and nowadays most apni girls are wanting to follow the more westernised culture, lets not cover that up. I used to be one of them. Rishta with cousins etc is a good way of keeping them focused and not letting them forget abut traditions and rasamz from hundreds of years ago! As much as Islam is growing there are some people in the world trying to make things difficult, terrorism/gang culture load of bullsh** tbh, that isn't what ISLAM teaches, that's society itself impacting youths, I could go on all night bout that matter but I'll leave it, for another time maybe! I have learnt Islam is the best place to be, following words of the Qur'an and by llistening to teachings I have found inner peace and changed as a person. Allah Hafiz
Topic
Re: Cousin Marriage
Author
C Ali
Date Created
23/02/2010 20:44:09
Message
Sorry to burst your bubble, Iffy but I happen to work for the CPR team in a hospital and after more than 3 years we have all noticed that the MAJORITY of infant cardiac arrests and fatalities are patients whose parents are cousins. Blaming the stresses of moving or living in the West as the cause of birth defects is infantile. Yes, man or a woman has the right to marry whomever they wish but continuous inter-family marriages within the same family over several generations is bound to produce some kind of recessive gene disorder or other kind of birth defect.
Topic
Re: Cousin Marriage
Author
Maryam McKenna
Date Created
08/04/2010 20:15:04
Message
what nonsense. What an example to give as defence... Henry VIII- he was a mysogynistic despot. The problem in the Pakistani community is in their hypocricy and mistreatment of women. The royal family example you give is a third cousin- thats not an issue. You are small minded and have missed the point totally. If a people feel oppressed in a community then it is of their own making- a reflection of what is wrong in themselves. I believe strongly that the West/non Muslim can teach us alot but Pakistani's are steeped in arrogance and ego and erroneously believe that they have the monopoly on Islam, Their hypocracy beggars belief. They live in a guise of corner shops, selling alcohol, pornography, gambling matter, oppressing the females in their households whilst outwardly claiming to be pillars of society! What poison!!!!
I saw the Pakistani practices in the society when I was a child growing up (as a non-muslim). Their corner shop, oppressed wife, white woman on the side, selling corruptions to under-aged youth. Now I am a Muslimah for 24 years and i still see it. No wonder the BNP are taking hold. It is time the Pakistani men woke up and smelled the coffee, instead of using their nose to look down at the 'Gori' who keep them in business. I am a 'Gori' who speaks from experience having been married to different Pakistani men.... their cowardliness and hyprocracy was beyond the pail. Alhamdulillah He swt saved me from them.
If you want to defend a thing, defend the females of the Pakistani communities. They are crystal like any other Muslim female on earth. If you men really understood, if you men really understood, if you men really understood.
Topic
Re: Cousin Marriage
Author
Iftikhar
Date Created
10/04/2010 22:45:40
Message
Salaam
Thanks for your thought provoking response. I agree with every thing you said. But do not forget that needs and demands of native Muslims are entirely different form those of migrant Muslims. It is difficult for you to understand.
My daughter was married to her first cousin, has two grown up young children without any defects. My eldest brother was married to his first cousin with seven children. Four of them are medical doctors and not a single child has any defects. Million of Muslims through out the world are married to their first cousins. Some of them have defective children. I know a family with three defective children. They have no relation with each other. My cousin married a Hindu girl in canada and they have a girl with some sorts of defects. Doctor has advised them not to have any more children. My nephew in Pakistan was married to his first cousin. They have three highly educated children.
The ground reality is that British society does not want Muslim parents to get marry their children back home. Man is a product of his culture, language and faith. Muslim communities live in Britain. Majority of Muslims are from Pakistan. Their culture and language is differnt from Bengali or Gujratior Turkish and Arabs. They have only faith in common. They only marry among their own communities because of culture and language. This is the ground reality.
In the 70s, when I raised ithe issue of bilingualism and Muslim schools, I was given the impression that British education system does not believe in bilingualism. According to varities of studies, a child will suffer if he/she finds himself cut off from his/her cultural and linguistic roots. Arabic is our religious language and each and every Muslim must be well versd in Quranic Arabic. This the main reason why I believe that Pakistani parents must find marriage partners from Pakistan for their children. Pakistani children and youths suffer more than others because they find themselves cut off from the literature and poetry. Majority of them are not even well versed in Standard English. This is the main rason why majority of Pakistani children leave schools without goood qualification. English is their economic language while Urdu is their social and emotional and Arabic is their religious language.
I am concerned with the education of bilingual Muslim children. I set up the first Muslim school in London in 1981 and now there are round about 140 Muslim schools and only 11 are state funded. I would like to see each and every Muslim child to be in a Muslim school.
A study by Bristol University reveals that a high level of racial segregation in Oldham schools and tension between communities resulted in recent riots in 2001. The solution is that those schools where Muslim children are majority, may be designated as Muslim community schools. The native parents do not want their children to be educated along with migrant chiildren. As soon as they find that the number of other children are on the increase, they move their children to those schools where native children are in majority.
There are hundreds of state schools where Muslim children are in majority. In my opinion, all such schools may be designated as Muslim community schools with bilingual Muslim teachers as role models. There is no place for a non-Muslim child or a teacher in a Muslim school.
Please visit www.londonschoolofislamics.org.uk for more information on this complicated and complicated issue.
Topic
Re: Cousin Marriage
Author
iram ramzan
Date Created
20/04/2010 12:58:53
Message
I agree one HUNDRED per cent with Maryam I could not have said it better myself
the example of the royal family is pointless royal families always marry cousins to keep the bloodline pure and even then thats only ROYAL families most White Brits dont marry cousins
you talk about racist britain if its so racist why do u come to this country n bring all ur relatives here if u hate it so much u talk about racism n yet pakistani ppl r incredibly racist themselves not only do they discriminate against non pakistanis but they discriminate AMONGST other pakistanis themselves ie someone who is of another caste
its absolutely ridiculous
marrying your cousins does NOT bring your families together u already share dna and blood, what more do u need?! furthermore, people are made to marry cousins from "back home" so that their spouses can come to the uk n send money back thats it its nothing to do with keeping families together and when the couple are experiencing problems it affects the WHOLE family
you talk about racist britain not wanting to bring more pakistanis here yet MORE pakistanis come here each year n are given visas n permanent stays so ur point is baseless
if u want to marry your cousins go ahead n do that but dont start preaching to evreyone to start marrying pakitsanis only
you pick ONE example n apply it to everything eg the propher pbuh marrying his daughter to a cousin the prophet pbuh married women from DIFFERENT tribes, one of whom was JEWISH at the time of marriage! and yet noone seems to take that into account
the Qur'an clearly states "O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female and made you into nations and tribes that ye may know each other (not that ye may despise each other)."
children from mixed marriages tend to be more tolerant towards other ppl and our pakistani communities are still discriminating against others based on what caste theyre from what a joke
and in response to the first comment about "apni" girls following the "western culture", excuse me but what about the men? They go around, messing around with girls until they finally get married from "back home" and even then they still keep girls on the side. The men get away with murder and the women have to suffer
Sort your own communities out first before writing such ridiculous articles
Topic
Re: Cousin Marriage
Author
Leyla Moon
Date Created
20/04/2010 13:38:06
Message
'The defects are nothing to do with cousin marriages'. That's not necessarily true. If within a family there are silent carriers of a disease, when they marry this passes on to the children who become sufferes of the disease. In fact its actually quite common.
As for your theory that cousin marriage is thought to generate a more stable marriage - i really don't see how this can happen. I think it's a selfish practice in order to maintain the patriachal family hierarchy that we see in pakistani families. Speaking as someone who's from a family where cousin marriages have (forcibly) occured in the older generations, I can honestly say it has ruined more lives than I care to count, although of course not the lives of the family memebers who arrange them in the first place.
A poisonous practice and should be done away with.
